Spring Storms

It’s been a challenging start to the year. I’ve found myself unhappy or unsatisfied in multiple areas of life and knew some changes were needed. I paused grad school because it just became too much to manage on top of all the other factors of life. I also put in an early resignation. I will finish out the school year in my current role, but then it’s time for me to find a new district. I debated a shift in careers but that just felt like too big of a change at this time. I’ve been on a higher dosage of my medication recently and I am starting to notice a difference. It’s been difficult to share anything about life recently because most of 2024 has been a struggle within myself. I won’t get into it too much, but I will say depression is rough when its waves hit, and the past few months have been a constant flood of waves. It’s been nice to feel a little more like myself the past few weeks. I'm hopeful that before summer I'll feel like myself and that we'll be able to have some fun plans!

The positive news is that I’m feeling changes are coming…slowly but surely! I recently was able to make some decisions for the house. It’s more waiting now to then approve and order, but I at least was able to make initial decisions. Still no concrete timeline but I think the hope is to be home by the end of June…if sooner - great….if later - not so great. The waiting game is super frustrating and there are bursts I have of major homesickness. It's hard to accept a new norm when that norm is short term. I know I’ve been missing my own space, routine, and ability to control different things but it’s starting to be shared by the kids too. They love grandma and grandpa but they’re ready to be home. They’re ready to have only Mom tell them what to do. They’re ready to play in the backyard on our swingset, help make dinners, and sleep in their own beds. It’ll be nice to organize and get back home and into a routine before August pops up, silly to type out August but we all know truly how quickly the summer passes us by. 

The kid's cases will hopefully see some type of progress toward permanency this spring/summer. We’ve had lots of doctor appointments, evaluations, and therapies to support growth and transitions for school. Parts of this have been overwhelming but I'm taking each appointment one step at a time with faith that will will work out the way it's intended. The kids had a wonderful Easter. They’re attending lots of birthday parties. Still enjoying gymnastics. Flag football just ended and dance has a month and a half left until recital. They’ve been asking to play outside any chance it’s nice out. I subscribed to Aro so I’m on my phone less and can be outside and present more as mom. It has made a difference and yesterday just watching them ride bikes and play with friends was a simple joy. 

Overall, we’re super ready for summer (hopefully back in our home)! This is the first year I won’t be working at ESY. I don’t have any surgeries and we aren’t going anywhere for vacation. I think it will truly be the break we all need, especially once home to just enjoy our time together. I know this post was super short, but I just wanted to post because foster care is foster care and life hasn’t been easy but we’re getting by.

Thanks for reading our quick check-in. Here's to a chill summer 2024!