Start Fresh September

Summer went by too fast! We’re already at the end of September. We’ve passed back to school/daycare, a month of sports, graduate school has started, and the official first day of fall!

Summer was a beautiful time! This year was a significant eye-opener and I know I won’t be teaching ESY next year. Yes, the money is nice and we can definitely use it, but I did not get enough time with my kids. Part of summer as a teacher means appointments for the next year and part of foster care means summer is when you plan all required visits, evaluations, check-ins, visitations with caseworkers, GALs, etc. I want more days at the park, trips to the library, water play in the backyard, spontaneous zoo time, and so much more. Between the fourth of July, a week of vacation, and weddings, we didn’t get too much time together. I’m not complaining, just acknowledging the past few summers teaching ESY has led to less time to be a mom and enjoy with the kids. I don’t want that to continue. We have busy enough lives, that the few weeks/month we get to enjoy I want to soak it in fully!

Disney was truly a magical time! I wish I could share all our pictures, memories, and stories but that would be it’s own book. All I can say is I would do that trip again in a heartbeat. The kids loved meeting their favorite characters, they were in awe of the shows, enjoyed all the rides and since we’ve been home keep telling me all the things they’re going to do when we go back. I will forever treasure these memories because as we’re all learning the world of foster care is forever unknown!

After Disney, truly the next morning, I went to the hospital to pick up Baby Flor. She’s already been through a lot but since the day I picked her up, we’ve been bonding and connecting, as well as the other kids loving her. It was a really great transition in our home. I need to step up my cleaning and organizing game with 4 littles 5 and under - but I’m okay with a messy house as long as the kids are loved, safe, cared for, and able to express themselves.

The transition back to school, daycare, and work for me went smoother than I had anticipated. The kids are all thrilled to be back into a routine. I however am trying to manage our new routine and find time to get things done. As I’ve shared before I’m a black-and-white thinker when it comes to a lot of things so if I can’t get the task fully done I’m still struggling to start it. I’ve gotten better about other things around the house but those bigger ideas I have are more difficult to attain. October begins on Sunday - and we only have two more weeks of soccer. We have some fun Halloween and fall things to do, but nothing that feels overwhelming at the moment. I’m excited to see what this next month brings.

October we’re trying to continue to keep things at home or try limiting ourselves to only one thing per weekend. I have some ideas for movie nights that I’m really excited about! If anyone’s looking for a fun fall/Halloween movie let me know if you have a free Friday and wish to join. We’ve also hit our crafting era and the kids want to do nothing more than paint so I now have some fun fall projects for them! I’m excited to see how they turn out. They’ve been asking for me to hang all their paintings all over, and as we know it’s hard to keep their stuff all over - so these projects are holiday-based and can be up for Halloween and then be kept!

I’ve hit the ground running at work, and I am excited about all the potential this role has but it’s been more challenging to put it into action. My boss has been very supportive of the vision I have and is helping me to concretely put steps into action. She also encouraged me to go back and get my degree as an administrator. I considered it for a while but am going to stick with the reading specialist degree for now. I may go back in a few years if I feel I really am feeling called to continue this position but at the end of last year I was really up in the air of where I saw my future. I will continue to put all my efforts into designing this program to be the best it can be. So far it’s going well. The projects are a bit more difficult as our student population is different than a general education school, but I’m finding ways to make it work!

I just shared that I stopped seeing my therapist. This was truly a major step for me. I felt I had to continue to see her because I’m on an anti-depressant and anti-anxiety medication. I’ve always expressed that if I decided to take medication I needed to be in therapy, however, the past 10 months on medication have taught me that I was unable to make progress without it and that’s why I was continuously needing therapy. The progress I’ve made between January and now is truly notable for me. I can list what I’ve gained, I can pause and reflect, and I can articulate my feelings. These things all would manifest into a major anxiety attack and I didn’t know where to go from there. I’ve learned how to be in the present more, live within the moment, and calm down around areas I cannot control.

Here’s to a fun fall full of laughter, love, hope, and staying present! I hope to connect with friends I’ve distanced from, but also know I can’t put in all the effort and if friendships fall - that’s okay. I love the people in my life, but can only control how I support others, not how they support me.